The Whispers in the Wind

I, like so many of us, was reeling from the pain of that day and all the repercussions that followed. Endless questions about how such an attack on innocent communities could ever have been allowed to happen. Our very foundation had been rocked so deeply that we were left feeling utterly abandoned by our ruling parties. I am not one to assign blame but as of writing, nobody has ever apologized to me for the catastrophic governmental failures that came to pass on that fateful day.

With time on my hands to try and make sense of our situation, I spent long hours trying to understand my place in all of this chaos. I searched my soul looking for answers on how to move forward. Then it hit me, I knew that deep down, I wanted to help people. My previous life as a quality control operative had brought me very little fulfillment in life. After the events of October 7th 2023 I knew that helping people was my new calling.

I would sit outside our hotel room in Ein Gedi and feed the birds. The Grackles were especially friendly even hopping onto my hand for a sunflower seed breakfast. It was on one such occasion when I was particularly feeling the grief and loss we had suffered that I remembered that once upon a time I had wanted to become a life coach.

Once the thought entered my mind I acted without hesitation and scoured the internet for courses that I could start as soon as possible. I found a course with ICF (International Coaching Federation) accreditation and signed up. This was the best decision I have ever made, in my life, career-wise.

New Beginnings 

Nine months to the day from the horrific events of October 7th 2023, I am now a Certified Life Coach. It gives me a good feeling writing that down. I have a long way to go as far as building a career but I have made the first and biggest step.

The process of studying over the last 6 months has given me great insight into the mechanics of recovery that I am undergoing. I was diagnosed with PTSD as were pretty much everyone affected by what had happened. By studying life coaching I was, in a way, coaching myself to achieving my purpose in life. I know that I have a long way to go and the future is far from clear. I do however know that my trajectory is true and that the path I have chosen is the right one.

Daily Existence

Echos of the past will likely haunt me for the rest of my days. Reminders of our beautiful life are everywhere I look. The grief I feel is real. I will forever mourn the life we had and the home we had made. I try to remember, with gratitude all that we had, however, I am not a robot, I am a wounded soul, and remembering all that we had, causes me the greatest sadness on a scale I wish that nobody should ever have to suffer.

Yes, I feel this every day. I do however conduct my days with some form of routine. Shower, coffee and work is the order of my day. I still work remotely which suits me fine. I have no emotional investment in my work, it is just work, a means to an end. Working from “home” gives me freedom and flexibility to not be tied to my desk all day.

Meyrav and I no longer watch television although I still indulge in watching Youtube and Formula 1. We now play “Shesh-Besh” which is the local name for the game Backgammon. We are getting quite good.